I’m Pissed Off …
“Do you mind if I take a leak before I kill you?”
I am a sporadic gamer, and when I do play games, I play random ones. I’m not devoted to one game in particular; however, I do enjoy Madden NFL…a lot. Recently while playing, True Crime: Streets of LA, I noticed an interesting cut scene. There was a Russian Mafia goon urinating, and the lead character “Nick Kang” simultaneously kicked him is his back. Once kicked, Kang says “You have the right to soak in your own urine”.
I now understand why in June 2007, the American Medical Association considered a proposal to designate video game addiction as a mental disorder on the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. And it comes as no surprise to me that in Argentina, a federal legislation states that Manufacturers and/or importers of video games are required to display the warning “Overexposure is harmful to health” on the packaging.
So we now understand, especially after certain awful and highly publicized tragedies, that excessive and obsessive gaming can lead to poor overall health, or even worse, death. However, even after reading about the 28-year-old South Korean man that died after playing Starcraft for 50 hours straight, I am still not convinced that mental or physical health should top the list of concerns. No, because you see when it comes to “gaming” and “hygiene”, we have a larger and more imperative issue.
After my mini session of playing True Crime: Streets of LA, I decided to do some homework on the subject of video games that portray or reference urination. I got in contact with an old friend from school who is now heavily involved in game development. I asked him if he could provide me with a list of games that have involved or encouraged urination. He came back with a list of “note-worthy” games, some of which included the following:
• In Redneck Rampage the players can urinate or defecate in toilets for health benefits, or “take a quick pee” anywhere for a smaller health boost at any time, once a level.
• In Overlord, one can send ones minions over beer mugs, thereafter the minion becomes intoxicated, turns away from the camera, and urinates.
• In Dead Rising, players can save your game by urinating in a urinal.
• In Postal, the player is able to urinate on anything in the game.
• In Hitman 2: Silent Assassin cut scene showing a postman urinating in the bushes, you sneak up behind him while he is urinating and take his clothes.
• Resident Evil 4: In the intro of the game one of the European Police Officers stops the SUV and gets out to urinate.
Obviously, the sole reason these games or (developers!) depict urination is because they are trying to get across the underlying message: “Dear Fanboy, you don’t need to pause the game. It’s okay, just piss all over yourself and keep playing. However, if you’re going to partake in autoeroticism, you will need to take your hands off the controller. Unless, of course, you’re playing with your Wii.”’
