Halo’s storyline finally comes full circle, and not the good kind of circle I used to draw in math class with a compass — the bad kind of circle I used to draw on the asphalt when I was five!
If Bungie’s mission was to make us feel like pigeons, preordering the game, waiting three months, and ultimately paying $60 for a game that doesn’t deliver anything that remotely resembles a decent story, then CONGRATULATIONS!
If I didn’t preorder it, wait three months, and drop $60, I would throw the Halo 3 game disk into my bathroom sink and set it on fire, then use it to line Pirate’s (my cat) cat box.
If you think I’m being harsh, lets take a trip down memory lane. There I was sitting at my computer watching the first CGI trailer for Halo 3 (you know, the one with the two kids staring at the stars asking philosophical questions) then BAM, in comes Master Chief caught up in some massive battle putting on his helmet. The first thing that crossed my mind was “are we finally going to learn about Master Chief’s past?” The answer: Of course not! I mean, why would I ever think that?
And the actual storyline (I use that word loosely) is a much bigger letdown than being denied a glimpse under the Chief’s helmet. For starters, how about the fact that they cut the entire “Arbiter” storyline right out of the game? Heck, why not — it’s not like he had a role in Halo 2 or a big part in Halo 3 — he’s just your right hand man for the entire game!
Let’s not forget about Cortana. In fact, you couldn’t even if you wanted to since she pops up on your screen every 15 to 30 minutes slowing your gameplay down. Her random babble annoyed me and didn’t have a direct connection to the story at all. Oh, and does anyone remember Gravemind from Halo 2? Well, you might as well forget him, because he’s not in Halo 3 — unless you count his one-sided dialogue, which like Cortana, slows down your gameplay.
As far as weapons go, there are few new additions, and what was added wasn’t very impressive or useful for that matter. I found myself using the Assault Rifle throughout the majority of the game, that is until I ran into a tank, then I would either use the rocket launcher or run into it with a Ghost, firing repeatedly until it exploded.
There are some new vehicles as well, like the Chopper (the brute version of an ATV) which closely resembles a 1980′s Big Wheel, and the Hornet (the human version of the Banshee) which looks a lot like the Turtle Glider from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles .
One new feature they added, which I thought was awesome, was the ability to destroy the Scarabs, the giant spider like tanks featured in cut scenes from past iterations of the game. Of course that lost its luster once I realized all you had to do to destroy it was stand underneath its leg joints and fire away.
Graphics are what you would expect from a next gen Halo game, as it features bright shiny colors throughout. In terms of sound, though, it didn’t take long before the same Halo theme beat me into submission. Although with new renditions of the theme added, there were moments where I expected a Brown Coat or Reavers to jump out (yea a Firefly references — I’m a nerd).
Overall, I was not impressed with Bungie and Microsoft’s agenda to make more money by milking a franchise for all its worth (did you get your Halo themed Xbox 360?), and I can assure you this won’t be the last time we all see Master Chief.
Campaign – Reviewed by Rob Way.
Multiplayer – Reviewed by Andrew Podolsky. (click here to read)
Overall – Rob Way & Andrew Podolsky fight it out…results below.