Pac-Man Did It: NFL Player Adam Jones Ditches Evil Videogame Nickname
by Chad Lakkis on June 18, 2008 at 2:47 pm
We can’t wait to read his book “How Pacman ruined my life”
News from the world of the National Football League is that former 1st round draft pick by the Tennessee Titans, Adam “Pacman” Jones (currently with the Dallas Cowboys), has publicly requested to the press that he no longer be referred to as “Pacman”.
At one point in time, “Pacman” was synonymous with Adam Jones. The two were inseparable. Ask Forrest Gump, and he would tell you they were like “peas and carrots”. His NFL jersey even featured the initial “P”. If you are asking yourself, “why would Adam part ways with Pacman?”, allow us to explain…
“Pacman” was suspended for the duration of the 2007 NFL season due to his off the field antics which included tossing gobs (roughly 81 thousand dollars) of money into the air at a Las Vegas strip club, spitting in the face of stripper (who he accused of stealing his wallet), refusing to pay his valet charge, confrontation with the law, and failing to meet the requirements of his probation.
—- begin sarcasm —-
The sad thing is, that while “Pacman” was out causing problems, “Adam” was home watching Antiques Roadshow on PBS, eating Fig Newtons, and contemplating solutions for world peace. Despite Adam’s best efforts to control Pacman, the off the field antics continued.
—- end sarcasm —-
During his 2007 suspension from pro football, “Pacman” signed with TNA Wrestling, making several appearances on the program, and even sharing half of the tag team title despite a contract between his current NFL team and TNA which clearly stated that he would not take on any type of physical role.
—- begin sarcasm —-
This was the last straw for “Adam” — he was not about to let that evil “Pacman” ruin his good name any further.
—- end sarcasm —-
Run a quick search on Google for the word Pacman, and sadly you will get mixed results — some will be the character we all know and love as gamers, while the others will pertain to an overpaid immature athlete.
My heart goes out to Namco’s yellow ball of arcade nostalgia. Not only did Adam “Grow Up” Jones embrace the nickname of one of the most iconic figures in videogame history, he now intends to permanently tie his foolish and despicable past to the Pac-Man, as he attempts to break his ties with him forever.
Bad Pacman! Leave poor Adam alone!
P.S. The pleasure that Pacman once shared in being tied to Adam Jones, will now be passed on to Adam Jones, the Grammy Award-winning musician born in 1965.
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11 Comments » |
on June 18, 2008 2:54 pm
I don’t get it… Why was this guy called pac-man to begin with?
on June 18, 2008 3:12 pm
Because Pac-Man is cool until he starts fucking with your mind.
on June 18, 2008 3:21 pm
So was he called pac-man for his on-the-field antics or off-the-field?
on June 18, 2008 3:29 pm
He was nicknamed Pacman in college and he carried the name with him into the NFL. He was very proud of the name and I find it hilarious now that as he attempts to turn over a new leaf, one of the FIRST things he does is tell the media that “Pacman” of all things is no more.
Why not continue to go by “Pacman” and just change the things off the field that have made you look foolish? If anything his “Pacman” nickname was one of the few redeeming qualities the guy had.
on June 18, 2008 3:39 pm
Yes, but why is he called pac-man? Was he a pill-popper? Does he eat ghosts? He’s not bald, he’s not yellow, his mouth isn’t the size of the rest of his face. Does he make “waka-waka-waka” sounds when he moves around?
on June 18, 2008 3:52 pm
Yes. He makes the “waka-waka-waka” sound when he moves.
on June 18, 2008 4:09 pm
Oh, okay then.
on June 18, 2008 6:31 pm
According to TitanOnline.com he got the pacman name because “he used to drink milk with the voraciousness of the Pac-Man video game character” when he was a kid.
on June 18, 2008 6:37 pm
Pac-Man has been corrupting him since he was a child. I smell a lawsuit.
on June 18, 2008 9:34 pm
What!?! Pac-Man doesn’t drink milk! How do you drink milk like somebody eats something else… unless the milk was rotten and chunky…
Excuse me…
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I totally just made myself hurl.
on June 19, 2008 3:01 pm
He got the nickname before college. His parents called him that because when he was a baby he went after his mother’s teet (milk) like PacMan.