Gears of War 2 To Get Gore Filter, Swear Filter, and Unicorn Lancers
by John Kershaw on August 5, 2008 at 6:53 am

Sadly, the above is not a new screen shot. It is but a fanciful idea I had. I’m sorry, Gears 2 doesn’t come with Unicorn Lancers, but the filters are real. It’s looking like Gears 2 will follow in first Gear’s footsteps and implement a filter for both violence and language.
Even though the game already has an ‘M’ rating, which I always interpreted as “mature” as opposed to “3 and up”, I guess some whiny brats may pester mummy for an early Christmas present, and we can’t have little Timmy hearing the f-bomb now can we?
Ok, I’m being a little pedantic. There are a number of reasons why you may want this filter in place, if you’re playing in front of relatives, if you want the performance gain from less blood, or if you don’t like it when your entire screen gets covered in red ooze.
Whatever your preference, come November 7th, at least Timmy will be safe.
As an aside, if like me, you think the idea of a weekly “Unicorns of Mass Destruction” column, in which I photo-shop unicorns in place of famous videogame weapons is a good idea, please do let me know.
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9 Comments » |








on August 5, 2008 6:55 am
Awww, no Unicorn lancers? :(
/wrists
A Unicorns of Mass Destruction weekly sounds great, as long as Sony won’t sue you for storing UMD’s in Iraq.
on August 5, 2008 6:57 am
No hate speech? wtf…
on August 5, 2008 6:57 am
I also heard that the Hammer of Dawn will be replaced with the Rainbow of Love.
on August 5, 2008 6:57 am
Is there a filter option to make everyone sit around sipping hot tea whilst listening to some Lionel Richie?
“Unicorns of Mass Destruction”….DO WANT!
on August 5, 2008 6:57 am
RARG FEEL THE PAIN OF UNICORN. Unicorns of Mass Destruction Column please.
on August 5, 2008 7:09 am
what is this? is this funny? i’m not laughing. unicorns are rare. so any lancer should be banned on sight. you know what the fine to possesion of unicorn artifacts is? deathrow.
on August 5, 2008 2:07 pm
i also heard they might change Cole Train’s name to Wind/Solar Powered Carbon Footprint Conscious People Mover.
on August 5, 2008 10:00 pm
Hey Jon, you heard that too?
on November 30, 2008 2:08 am
omg guy’z i was playing and a guy cut my head of with a giant dildo omg i was scard for life
i was like…. ——> o_o –> O_O ———–> ()_() —-> D_D —-> (O)___(O) omg….
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