Bravo, Valve. Bravo.

The video above is the latest “Meet the” TF2 video from Valve, showcasing what I’m convinced is the most powerful class in the game- SANDWICH. Weighing in at 120mg, it’s variety of weapons include, but is not limited to swiss cheese, two slices of whole wheat bread, and new meat.  Okay, okay, so its not actually a playable class, rather than a portable medikit of sorts, but the second it becomes a playable class, you better grab some Saran wrap and head for the hills.

For the past week, Valve has been releasing, bit by bit, parts of the new update coming to the PC version of TF2 very soon. Hit the jump for the full details of the update, which include a new map, new achievements, and a new minigun for Sasha to be jealous of.


The first update from last week was the announcement that community member Jamie “Fishbus” Manson’s map cp_steel was becoming an officially supported map, which means Fishbus is probably rolling around in royalties right about now. The full details of the announcement:

A complex Attack/Defense control point map, with some unique gameplay. Unlike most TF2 maps, capturing a control point modifies the layout of the map, opening and closing routes for each team. As a result, the offensive team has a wide variety of tactical choices around how they’d like to assault the final point. Should they use Scouts and Soldiers to rush the final point with only the routes they start with? Should they go for the side control points and open up more routes to the final? Should they capture extra points to shut down the defender’s routes? The many choices keep the map interesting for a long time, providing a wide variety of experiences in a game.

Valve came in at full force with the second update with the Killing Gloves of Boxing, or the KGB. Though I’m sure many of the Goldeneye fans know this, but apparently, the title is a throwback to the Soviet Union’s intelligence agency. They also revealed the 35 Heavy achievements that would come with the update, which you can see at the above link.

The unlockable for the Heaviest pugilists out there is the K.G.B. Any time a Heavy kills an enemy with the K.G.B he receives five seconds of guaranteed critical hits. This crit-boost can be used to punch and kill further enemies, extending the boost time. Alternatively, the Heavy can switch to another weapon and use the boost to take out an enemy at range. The Heavy’s slow movement speed, and the K.G.B’s slower swing speed, make it a risky prospect.

The third update of the week was the Badwater Basin, which is a new map for players in which you try to push forward and destroy the opposite team’s base. The update is a bit confusing, so I’ve attached Valve’s explanation for you to decipher it for yourselves.

Badwater Basin is a Payload map focusing on more open spaces and less chokepoints than Gold Rush. (A) Right out of the gate is a multi-level area where the Blu team needs to control the high ground while moving the cart through a tunnel below. This open area has few natural choke points, allowing Scouts, Soldiers, and Demomen to move creatively through the space, forcing the Red team to rapidly respond to choices made by Blu. (B) As the track winds its way into tighter spaces, vertical control becomes more important. Each successive checkpoint requires the Blu team to take control of defensive positions above the track, usually occupied by Red Engineers. (C) Eventually the track winds down into a large basin which the Blu team must assault from all sides in a final push to destroy the Red base.

Unlike Gold Rush, where the track is split into three separate stages, Badwater Basin uses a single large stage with several checkpoints. As a result, the Blu team is highly encouraged to push the cart hard after beating their way through the Red defensive line.

Valve’s 4th update of the week was Natascha, the new minigun that will slow down its victims upon impact. Though I’m sure some TF2 aficionados will dismiss this update as being pointless (especially since it doesn’t do as much damage as Sasha) I think it has plenty of potential.

The Heavy’s second unlockable, Natascha, slows enemies with her bullets. Anyone damaged by her will move slower for an instant, encouraging them to find cover or turn and face the Heavy, mano-a-tiny-itty-bitty-mano. Unfortunately, Natascha is slightly weaker than Sasha, so she takes longer to finish off a victim. As a result, Natascha’s great against fleeing cowards, such as Scouts & Medics, and less great against anyone actively trying to kill her master. Heavies that like to jump around corners and surprise groups of startled enemy crybabies will also find her very useful, although they should look for a Sasha-wielding enemy Heavy before they leap.

The fifth update was postoned until yesterday and was even delayed a little, but I’m sure fans will be pleased with the update nevertheless. Valve has given us another game mode to screw around in- Arena Mode, where the main focus of the game is nothing more than combat. Arena also premiered with 5 playable maps, two of which are brand new- Lumberyard and Ravine. The other three are Well, Granary and Badlands, which have been playable as regular maps for a while.

TF2 Arena keeps the class diversity of Team Fortress 2 while focusing goals around combat between two teams. Where other game modes lean towards a broad overall strategy for the team over a number of lives, Arena concentrates on the specific tactical choices the teams make in a single fight.

Arena features smaller maps that play out in shorter periods of time. The round ends once one team has no players left in the arena, or when the central capture point has unlocked and been captured. Rounds tend to be very fast and highly competitive, with an emphasis on your team’s class makeup and your plan to counter the opposing team’s class choices. Arena mode is great for smaller matches of three vs. three players, while still comfortably supporting huge knockdown twelve-on-twelve brawls.

ARENA CLASS STRATEGIES

Health pick-ups are limited in TF2 Arena (some levels don’t have any Health packs at all) so being careful is a good strategy for any class. As well, with so little health available, having a Medic or a Health dispenser-building Engineer on your team can be a crucial element to success. With their reconnaissance abilities, the Scout and Spy play a far more vital role in Arena than in other game modes. Knowing the location of the enemy team can often mean the difference between a win and a loss. The Soldier and Demoman will find many areas in Arena specifically designed for them to get a vertical advantage. Traditional Heavy/Medic pairings will still be highly useful as the anchor to a good Arena team. However, commit too far in this direction and the enemy can quickly overwhelm you with Snipers and Spies. In Arena, water is as scarce as Health. This makes the Pyro a much deadlier class, as any enemy player he sets on fire with his flamethrower or flare gun will be unable to put out the flames. Igniting enemies quickly, then retreating to safety, can be an effective strategy for the Pyro.

The sixth and presumably final update was released earlier today, and introduces the world to The Sandvich, a portable medikit of sorts that will revive 120 health and fill your Heavy with satisfaction. And a sandwich. At the top of this post is the Meet The Sandvich video that Valve posted on its site as well.

The Sandvich is the Heavy’s first unlockable. It tastes as good as it looks and heals 120 health. Like in real life, the decision to eat a Sandvich must not be taken lightly; The Heavy is completely vulnerable during the four second eating process, and his loud, happy sounds of vigorous chewing will draw enemies like tiny ant cowards to a picnic. OF DEATH. On the bright side, the Heavy’s Sandvich supply is unlimited, so his only real concern is being caught short while enjoying this delicious edible device. The Sandvich is a great tool for a Heavy defending an area, as it gives him the ability to replenish health between enemy waves without having to abandon his post. Similarly, an offensive Heavy without a Medic can step back from the front line and grab a quick snack before resuming his rampage. Beware, however: the Heavy must set aside his shotgun to take the Sandvich, and enemy Snipers are much more dangerous for a Heavy wielding only a minigun.

Tags: heavy, steam, tasty sammich, Team-Fortress-2, Update, Valve

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