USA Sweeps Pokémon World Championships — Proof We are the Biggest Dorks on the Planet

The 2008 Pokémon World Championships took place this past weekend, along with the first-ever Video Game Showdown. Over 400 players from nearly 30 countries qualified for and competed in the Championships, but the United States swept first place in all three divisions of the Trading Card Game (TCG) finals. Additionally, the U.S. won the Junior Video Game Showdown title, while a kid from Hiroshima, Japan, won the Senior division (though I’m not sure if it was revenge-driven or if his mutated genes gave him an edge).
The top TCG dork of each division (Junior, Senior, and Masters) received a $7,500 scholarship, which really makes me wonder why 62-year-old people are even competing in this (the youngest was 6, if you were wondering). I also don’t understand exactly how the divisions are broken up. I assumed it was by age, but unless their is some crossover, it doesn’t make sense. Check out the results:
2008 Pokémon Trading Card Game World Champions – Junior Division
First Place: Tristan Robinson (11) from Denver, CO USA
Second Place: Takuto Itagaki (11) from Japan
Third Place: Simone Zucchelli (10) from Italy
2008 Pokémon Trading Card Game World Champions – Senior Division
First Place: Dylan Lefavour (14) from New England USA
Second Place: Paul Atanassov (11) from Canada
Third Place: Nicholas Kolibas (14) from Boston, MA USA
2008 Pokémon Trading Card Game World Champions – Masters Division
First Place: Jason Klaczynski (22) from Chicago, IL USA
Second Place: Khan Le (15) from Norway
Third Place: Gino Lombardi (18) from Johnston, RI USA
I suppose it’s possible that some of these kids had a birthday between the time they signed up and the time they competed in the finals, right? Yeah, that’s gotta be what it is. I know you probably don’t care about my thought process there, but some people may have had a similar confusion of the divisions, so shut your face.
The Video Game Showdown featured the top 64 players of the videogames Pokémon Diamond and Pokémon Pearl from the United States and Japan, which were all flown to Orlando to compete in the finals. The top geek in each division won a “six-day vacation package for four to New York City, Honolulu or Tokyo” and a customized Nintendo DS. The winners include:
Pokémon Video Game Showdown Junior Champion
Knight Silvayne (11) from Chicago, IL USA
Pokémon Video Game Showdown Senior Champion
Izuru Yoshimura (21) from Hiroshima City, Hirsoshima Pre. Japan
I don’t know why there wasn’t a Masters division in the Video Game Showdown, but that conundrum won’t be in my head by the time I finish writing this sentence… yup, it’s gone. Speaking of conundrums, the popularity of Pokémon itself is a real mystery. Want to read some crazy Pokémon facts?
- The Pokémon comic book outsells every other comic book on the shelf.
- After the original Pokémon was released, sales of Nintendo’s GameBoy system jumped 249%
- The Pokémon animated series is broadcast in more than 30 countries in over 25 languages.
- Pokémon episode number 35, “The Ledgendary Dratini”, got banned in the U.S. because too many guns were shown in the episode.
- Pokémon Diamond and Pokémon Pearl sold more than 1 million copies in the first five days and more than 14 million copies since their launch.
- Total Pokémon videogame sales of 175 million copies are second only to the Mario series.
- The Pokémon Trading Card Game is the number one collectible trading card game in the world.
- Pokémon is blamed for youngsters becoming materialistic and developing gambling problems.
- Pokémon is banned in Saudi Arabia.
- There are Pokémon commercial airplanes that are painted with a Pokémon motif and the insides are plastered with Pokémon — Pokémon headrests, Pokémon cups, the flight attendants wear Pokémon outfits, etc.

Pokémon scares me.











