The Watercooler – Paint Out Your Ass Edition
by Dan Landis on November 19, 2008 at 4:04 am
Warning: The Watercooler is the best thing you will see on the Internet today, mainly because it is the best thing I saw on the Internet yesterday. Be advised that these Watercooler stories are not necessarily videogame related (they usually won’t be), and are often silly, controversial, and/or not safe for work (NSFW). If this type of content frequently offends you, please be aware that I just warned you — if you still click through and get offended, it will be your own stupid fault. Otherwise, please continue…
Today’s Watercooler features a very perplexing ad for a product most of us are familiar with. Following the trend of the last few years in which commercials have absolutely nothing to do with the product they are advertising, this commercial features some nice fat dude shooting paint out of his ass.
That’s right. Paint out of his ass.
I usually say “You’re welcome” here, but I’m not sure if anyone’s thanking me on this one. Seriously, though, I’d like to here some suggestions on how this ad makes any kind of sense at all. The only thing I’m sure of is that Microsoft are some sick bastards and the Zune is apparently a painted piece of shit.
Think you have something that could be Watercooler material? Send it to dlandis@ripten.com. If your submission gets featured, you will win a prize package full of pride and accomplishment.
UPDATE: According to some guy from YouTube, this video is “not officially sanctioned by Microsoft”. I don’t know if that makes me feel better or worse.
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- The Watercooler – Michael Crichton Edition
- The Watercooler – Special Presidential Election Edition
- The Watercooler – 09 November 2008
- The Watercooler – The Watchmen Edition
- The Watercooler – 21 November 2008
19 Comments » |
on November 19, 2008 4:38 am
Cookigaki is as intrigued as Cookigaki is disgusted. Cookigaki believes commercial represents how Microsoft takes whatever comes out of ass and says “this is art, buy it”. Cookigaki doesn’t know how to interpret it any other way.
on November 19, 2008 4:56 am
I’m gonna have to agree with cookie face.
on November 19, 2008 5:04 am
OMGWTFBBQLOL!?!?!? I mean, um, it is my professional opinion that this commercial is pretty fucked up.
on November 19, 2008 5:13 am
fuck you Dan
on November 19, 2008 5:16 am
Dildawg, what did I do?
on November 19, 2008 7:08 am
As an artist, I see what MS was going with. However, they failed horribly in any attempts at being cool OR ironic.
on November 19, 2008 7:24 am
Atleast make a hot chick do this.
on November 19, 2008 7:35 am
Hey, finally something we can agree on.
on November 19, 2008 7:55 am
Agreed Allen. Chicks even like other chick’s asses, so its win-win.
on November 19, 2008 8:29 am
It’s true. I like chick asses and I’m not gay or anything. Chicks are just nice to look at because we are beautifully shaped, unlike bulky men. Where’s The Whaler, I know she agrees with this.
on November 19, 2008 8:51 am
And I get an ‘ew’ when I lick the salt out of my crisp packets?!
…I would have thought it’d be even more interesting to have a dog doing this. Just without the paint. Or canvas. Or projectile-iasion. Its a word.
on November 19, 2008 9:15 am
At least the Xbox commercials were creepy yet relevant. This video makes me think Microsoft is taking shots (not like the ones in the video) at art, kind of like saying “you pull/shoot things out of your ass and call it art”. In a few cases, yeah, it’s true…but..eww.. If i bought a zune, and stopped for a second to admire my newly purchased device, I don’t want to think of a fat hairy man’s crusty/painfilled rectum..and the fact I paid money for it.
on November 19, 2008 10:36 am
R is super hawt. Just sayin’
on November 19, 2008 2:06 pm
You made me watch this!
Well, you didn’t make me, but I trusted the Watercooler! NOW I DON’T KNOW TO TRUST
on November 19, 2008 2:35 pm
@SeasonedSalt:
When I look at a women it is strictly art appreciation.
on November 19, 2008 2:55 pm
I knew that the disclaimer warning for this article was there for a reason,but damn,at least they could’ve used a short asian lady instead of a uh…big hairy dude.
So the key to make transgressor ads involving nude scenes without being marked as sexist is to overwhelm the censors mind with Mr.Pilosity Mcbacon,shitting 24-bit RGB shit legs wide open over a virgin canvas,until the censors say they don’t even want to talk about it anymore.I would be confused too.
on November 19, 2008 3:59 pm
That like something Sony would do.
on November 19, 2008 11:33 pm
@SeasonedSalt: Heck yes :D
*goes lady huntin*
on November 20, 2008 3:22 am
@Sy,
Sony would first put some midgets dancing and lurking in the dark,making disgusting burtonian squeakings with mouths where their eyes should be,then the big man appears and shits all over their faces.