If EA Sports Stands Behind Tiger Woods, I’ve Got Some Great New Game Suggestions For Them

Tiger Woods is having a rough couple of weeks, as his inability to keep his club in the bag has cost him Gatorade, Accenture, and Gillette as sponsors. If EA Sports decides to back away from the golf celebrity on their PGA Title, no one would blame them one bit, but if they decide to disregard public perception and stand by his side, I’ve got a few other suggestions for new IPs the publisher could add to their 2011 portfolio.

Chris Brown is back in town and he’s got lots of Twitter rage for retailers who aren’t supporting his livelihood. Places like Wal-mart are refusing to carry his latest album titled “Graffiti”, but with the power of EA Sports at his disposal, there’s no doubt in my mind that a video game modeled after the musician/abusive asshole would be a huge success!

Who doesn’t dream of rubbing elbows with the stars as a famous talk show host when they grow up? But why stop with elbows? Take a tip from uncle Dave, and rub any staff member with two legs and a smile. Blonde, brunettes, and even red heads are all fair game as long as you can shrug it off on air with your witty sense of humor.

Last but not least, the Hoff! Sure, the latest remake of Knight Rider failed miserably, but that’s because it wasn’t a video game and it didn’t have America’s favorite smashed stud behind the wheel. Being exposed on Youtube shit faced on the floor trying to eat a burger may convince most men to turn their life around, but not Hoff baby! No, the DH man showed up plastered to the 2009 EMAs to commemorate the 20 year anniversary of the fall of the Berlin wall. EA’s commitment to authenticity paired with Hasselhoff’s commitment to ongoing public intoxication would all but secure an EA Sports Hasselhoff Drunk Rider title as one of the top video game nominee for 2011.

EA’s always on the look out for new IPs, so if you’ve got any suggestions to add to the list, leave them in the comments section below and I’ll do my best to work them up in Photoshop and add them to the post.