The Watercooler is a daily Ripten feature that basically gives people something to talk about. “Hey, did you see that video on The Watercooler today?” Of course you did.

Today’s Watercooler is all about the Marky Mark SNL skit and The Wahlberg’s subsequent response to it. It’s today’s video (videos, actually) because I thought it was funny and this is my thing, so whatever.

Do it.

You’re welcome.

Mark Wahlberg was spotted with his hand wrapped from a recent injury. Did he bust himself up during one of his diving slo-motion gun battles on the set of Max Payne, or perhaps from punching someone in the face with extreme Funky Bunchedness? Nope, turns out he took a crack on the wrist doing something far more dangerous: playing Wii Sports.

In an interview with British movie magazine Total Film, The Mark explained his injury:

“Um, it was tennis on the Wii! I was playing with my daughter the other day and she swung the remote real hard and it cracked me on the side of my wrist! Yeah, yeah. I know, I know. It sounds kinda funny – but it fuckin’ hurt, man!”

Seems strange to me that he would wrap it up, though. Why doesn’t he just pop some painkillers and chill out until his health refills? Duh!

Source: Total Film via Games Radar

After being nominated as some of the people in videogaming that need to “shut the fuck up“, Cliff Bleszinski and Mark Rein take it to the ring to decide which of the two of them wins the right to shut up more. Using the photo upload tools in EA’s new game Facebreaker, I was able to poorly reconstruct these two mammoths of mutilating machismo and let them do their thing. Video follows.

Mark came out swinging and really had Cliffy on the ropes, but the Blaznats is no bitch and came back with a vengeance. Too bad there’s a time limit — we’ll have to wait until the game releases in September to see what would happen if they weren’t confined to mere 90-second slap fights.

P.S. Does anyone else get the overwhelming urge to barf all over the place whenever they are subjected to EA Trax, or is that just me?

The cast and director of the upcoming game-to-film adaptation of Max Payne gave a little Q&A at the San Diego Comic-Con this past weekend.  Marky Mark discussed how he was really looking to kick ass again, and the director, John Moore, expressed how he intended to break the mold of videogame movies and make sure Max Payne doesn’t suck.

John Moore had the following to say in regards to making gamers happy:

“Here’s the funny thing about video games and movies — the minute you take that controller out of the player’s hands, you better deliver something of equal value. Ya gotta give them something so exciting and kick-ass and we thought the way to do that is to be highly subjective and make you feel like you are Max Payne.”

I’m not entirely sure how he intends to do that — is the movie shot from 3 feet behind Marky Mark except during cutscenes? As I said before, however, the trailer does have me excited for the movie. Of course, I’m a Marky Mark fan, so maybe I’m just biased. Speaking of Marky Mark, here’s what the actor said regarding his role as the titular Max Payne:

“I read the script — after Invincible and The Happening and Lovely Bones, I wanted to kick some ass again and I got an opportunity to do it in a way where I think I did more than I did in The Departed: movies like Four Brothers and Fear.”

They also apparently talked about a new camera the used called “The Phantom” that takes up to 1,000 frames per second (which is almost as fast as Crysis runs on my killer gaming PC). Bullet-time was a huge part of what made Max Payne (the game) what it is, but the difficulty they faced was doing slo-mo in a way that didn’t just look like The Matrix or a John Woo flick.

Wish I could be at Comic-Con myself, but at least the lucky bastards at Geeks of Doom keep me (and thus, you) informed.

I just watched the trailer for the upcoming movie adaptation of Max Payne, and it was shockingly good.  I had a certain expectation considering it was a videogame movie (that being that it would suck hard), but this film may have a shot at breaking the stereotype.  Read on to see the YouTube-ified trailer.

Personally, I like Marky Mark.  I think he’s a fine actor and has the perfect scowl-face for Max Payne.  Honestly, he would have made a much better Wolverine in the X-Men movies, even though Hugh Jackman is the shit, and the Funky Bunch could have been those other mutant schmoes.  Anyways, Marky Mark has played cops before, and he’s played sulky, angry dudes before.  He’s even already played an angry cop that was sulky and a dude –  Marky Mark is Max Payne.

Enough of my rambling — check out the trailer for yourself: